Many of the critics of this movie missed the point. This movie is not about plot or characters. Robert Altman does what movies are for; he takes us to another place.

What Altman does is give us a vivid impression of the incestuous whirl of the fashion world. His world is populated by both real designers (as ever spotting them is half the fun). and wonderful performances such as Richard E. Grant as a male Vivienne Westwood.

The movie also effectively transports us to Paris. And yes, Paris really is covered in "Dog Poop" (they were Paris jokes, not Poop jokes).

I think that many of the jokes about Paris, may have gone over the heads of US movie critics who have not set foot outside LA and New York.

One of the reviews of this movie described the fashion shows as "pointless". They were pointless in the same way a Monet is pointless; they were in the movie because they are beautiful.

To summarise, if you love Paris and you love fashion, you will love this. The closing credits of a montage of Issey Miyake and other fashion shows set to Grace Jones' "La Vie En Rose" is worth the price of admission alone.

An earlier reviewer asked if anyone knew why Danny Aiello ends up in drag. Well, I'll tell you why. Altman needed someone to utterly humiliate, and poor Aiello (a wonderful actor savagely mistreated here) gets saddled with the, um, "honors." As do Forest Whitaker and Linda Hunt.

In fact, trashing actors known for their sensitive portrayals in other (and better) films is the closest thing that Ready to Wear has to a plot. The degrading scene between Hunt and Stephen Rea left me feeling contaminated. If the editor Hunt portrays had been a glamorpuss type, then the bit about getting on her knees and pricking her fingers on rose thorns that Rea tosses at her might have been barely amusing. But Linda Hunt is so delicate that you feel protective of her; the physical contrast between her and the strapping Mr. Rea makes this sequence play like an excerpt from a training film for joining the Nazi party. It's disgusting. In its own repellent way, it's nearly as horrific as the dreaded coke bottle in the face nightmare from Altman's The Long Goodbye.

The only performers who transcend this deeply unfunny unforgivable fiasco are Anouk Aimee and Julia Roberts. Aimee alone is treated with dignity; she brings a real poignancy to her role as a successful businesswoman who's being sold up the river. Bob does his best to desecrate Julia but she outfoxes him with her devastating smile. Although her role isn't much, she manages to keep her footing as almost everyone else gets lost in the mudslide.

Or is dog poop??

Someone close to the world of these famous designers with their peculiar costumes and logos might get every one of the jokes, references, and even know that some of the real-life people the characters are based on.

The problem is that this world is an exclusive one. Whilst This Is Spinal Tap and The Blues Brothers satirised an industry and an art form known to many, the Paris fashion scene is available only a select few. For an object lesson in how to spoof the fashion business without alienating the general public, see Absolutely Fabulous.

The impressive roster of actors in the film (Sophia Loren, Lauren Bacall, Richard Grant, and Julia Roberts to name but four) and the directorial talents of Robert Altman are really wasted on a movie that is of such limited appeal.

Try on "Ready to Wear/Pret a Porter" and see how the fit suits you.